M.I.A

Sorry I've been gone. I got overwhelmed with things I should write about and things I shouldn't and I don't know. Shocker- I'm not doing so hot. One good thing has happened though. I'm going out with a good kid. His name is mike. I've liked him for a really long time...about three years and I finally told him I liked him. He said he actually liked me too for a while and now were going out.

I feel really insecure about it though. He doesn't know any of the bad stuff about me. And my exboyfriend is really pressuring me to get back together with him. I don't want to be hurt. I want mike to know everyhing about me, including the bad stuff. But I don't want him to think I'm crazy.

A lot of people think of me as crazy. It makes me sad. I'm doing worse with eating to. And cutting. Everything is getting worse. I don't really like my therapist anymore either. I can't talk to her or anything.

I got in trouble with school again. My friends talked to the principle about me and said I was suicidal and stuff. No I don't blame them, but it does make me think twice about what I say. I always say this. I'm not getting better, I'm just getting smarter.

My mom doesn't want me on zoloft anymore. She doesn't want me on any medicine. So guess I'm off antidepressants. Good idea right?

I'm exhausted now, I'm going to bed. I promise I'm back though. I'll continue to write regularly again. Good night