I'm the most depressed I've ever been, the most suicidal, the most alone, and the most fucked up. I keep screaming out for help but no one listens. No one cares. I don't know what to do. I don't even know what help I want or need anymore. I'm just a mess. I can't take this...
I'm at the point where I don't even know which way is up. I break down crying every other minuet it feels like. Maybe it's the depression, or the hormones, or the fact that I'm not taking my medicine anymore, or maybe it's all of the above. All I know is it sucks. I'm doing things I never even thought I would do...if I don't have anyone to be healthy for...I'm not going to be healthy..certainly not for myself.
No one cares anymore. No one. Not even my guidance consoler or anyone else who I thought would always have my back. They gave up on me too. Maybe it's time I give up on myself.
Please go to the hospital or something. I was extremely suicidal a few weeks ago and going to the hospital actually helped. It didn't fix everything but they at least got me out of crisis mode. Don't give up. No one can help you if you're dead and someone out there will help you.
ReplyDeleteAlana,
ReplyDeleteYou must not give up. You have a child inside of you who needs you more then anything. Keep fighting, stay healthly and go get the help you need. Like Elizabth mentioned go to the hosptial and who gives a shit what your parents will do. You need to do this for yourself and your child.
Melissa xoxoxo
I agree with Elizabeth and Melissa-go to the hospital and get yourself taken care of! And remember, when that baby is born, you will be it's whole world :-)
ReplyDelete