Depression is like...the weather?

I came home from school early today. I just needed at least part of the day to myself so I could just unwind. I really wish I could've talked to my guidance counselor, but she wasn't there. She won't be there tomorrow either. I hope shes doing okay too. 

Do you ever feel like sometimes your just trapped in this whirlwind of emotions that you just can't get out of? I feel like that. I feel like I'm trapped inside of my own mind. It's a frustrating thing to think about. 

My depression has seriously taken a toll for the worse. I feel like just an old, stray, and abused dog who is just looking to anyone and anything for love and protection. I really am just looking for somebody to be my hero. But I know that's unrealistic. I have to be my own hero. 

I think I'm starting to realize that the only person who can save me, is me. No matter what anyone says, what anyone does, at the end of the day, I'm the only one who can change me. And I think that scares me so much because I don't believe in myself. I don't think I'm capable of saving myself. I feel like every time I try, I dig myself deeper into the hole I'm already in. 

This is something I would love to share with everyone who doesn't understand depression, or anxiety disorders, or anything along the lines of that:
Depression is very much like the weather. It is what it is. If it's raining, it's raining. If it's snowy, than it's snowy. There isn't a thing that ANYBODY can do about it, no matter how hard we try. Sure, we can get an umbrella, and we can dress differently, but its only a mask. You strip away all the materialistic items, and all you're left with is the fact that it's raining. Or snowing. 

Depression is the same simply because it IS what it IS. We don't choose it, we can't change it no matter how hard we try, and we can't just pretend it's not there. It's just not that easy. 

But another thing about the weather, is that no matter how rainy, the sun will always come out. Be it for a day, or an hour, or however long. It will come again. It can rain for weeks and weeks, but there will always be some sunshine. That's what I think we all need to keep focusing on. I've been waiting for my sun for almost 4 years now. I know it will come soon. 

I'm just hoping there are no more hurricanes any time soon.